♥
Life's Inspirational Valiant Endeavors
~ Choosing Peace ~
I
have yet to meet another human being who *doesn’t* live with worry, a modicum
of regret or feel the steady downward pull of stress in their daily lives. If I
could sit down to a cup of tea or even a warm doughnut, and discuss *The
Journey* with the Dalai Lama himself, I would be most appreciative and humbled. I
am amazed by his culture’s resilient spirit and their chosen path to peace and
tranquility.
I,
however, spent much of my twenties and thirties practicing the shadowy art of
denial. My suffering eased, eventually, thanks to my younger brother’s keen
intuition and love for me, when he suggested way-back-when, that whatever it
was that I had been doing was apparently not working out so well, and that I
might do myself and those around me a giant favor ~ and just do something about it
already. Only, I didn’t quite understand what he was talking about at the time,
because I was standing on the edge of that river, Denial, soaking wet, a deafening noise in my brain and
furious with no one in particular.
Counseling
seemed the answer in my early teens. The right
someone (someone other than those closest to me, and whom I considered the
source of my pain) listened to me for the first time in my young life. I see
now it was on that therapeutic couch, literally speaking, that I first began to
believe in the existence of my own voice.
Then
Life happened. I grew up. I found my voice, but didn’t have a clue how to use
it. Like a child with a new toy, I thought it was mine to covet. And rather
than feel the uncomfortable process
of self-actualization and accept peace into my life, I buried my head deep in the
sand, eyes open for effect, and indulged my fears through self-preservation. Food, and the quest for love became my drugs of
choice. I married my high school sweetheart. We had a baby, then two, then
three. I, and my husband, lived relatively uncomplicated lives (outside of the
pain still brewing inside of me, in the form of anger and resentment) on an
artist’s meager but gloriously consistent salary, with a dog, two cats, a house full of
kids, car payments, and a mortgage.
It
was no Shangri-La, but looking back now, it was ~ Everything I always knew I wanted.
*Big
Sigh*
Remembering
the taste of sand
between my teeth, makes me want to eat cake.
between my teeth, makes me want to eat cake.
Here.
Now. I am forty-three! My three children are immersed in those pivotal stages in
their young lives, where I first entertained low self-esteem and self-deprecating
behavior and attitudes ~ 13, 15 and 18 years old. And There, but for the grace
of God, go they! It seems, one of my more modest life goals, has always been to try to live in a
place of peace ~ without the aid of cake. Somewhere in my mid-thirties, (Yep,
it only took me thirty-something years to access that part of my brain, folks.)
I felt, for the first time, the irony of Life itself.
No
longer drowning in the day to day monotony and the illusion of Life itself,
and feeling reasonably confident that my voice would be heard by those closest
to me, I lay my heart out on the table and took a leap of faith that no one
would stomp on it.
And
that is when I woke up.
"A long time on a crooked road."
~ Joe, "Joe Versus the Volcano"
I
awoke to the realization, that “Life is pain. You’ve got to scrape the joy out
of it.” I was no novice, no stranger to pain. No one is. “Aye, there’s the
rub!” (There, my friends, is the irony in Life. It is with little shame, that I
just quoted Rod Kimble and William Shakespeare in practically the same breath!)
Life
IS in the journey! It’s a slow walk, naked, barefooted, and as if that weren’t
enough of a lesson for us, bearing the weight in the struggle of those we love
and those we despise as well, through ten-thousand miles of our own fear-driven
conscience and consciousness. Hallelujah! Pass the gravy!
We
are on one great, life-altering expedition into the unknown the moment our
little hands and feet, and cheek, meet our mother’s breast, our father’s arms;
and if we’re lucky, a warm blanket and a healthy sense of
adventure.
Peace
lies within, like a flower eager to open itself to the sun. It has always been there inside of you. It
flows through the life blood in each and every cell in our bodies, before we
are even aware of the world outside
of us. Its purpose ~ to teach us something profound, something we cannot live and thrive without. To teach us how to love ~ ourselves, and others.
It is
my wish that, *Life is in the journey!* will serve all those who visit, as a
most important and profound reminder, through Laughter, Tears of Awe and Joy,
and through Peace... that there is comfort to be found in this journey we share.
We have only to choose to live
our lives, "...awake and in constant, total amazement!"
~
Alexander Tsiaras’, “Conception
to Birth” is, perhaps, one of the most beautiful and awe-inspiring stories we,
as humans, have to tell. A mathematician by trade, Tsiaras shares his expertise
and his talent for minute detail, with humility, in a lecture given ~ Here.
~ Life is in the journey! ~
Peace My Friends!
“The best
way out is always through.”
~ Robert
Frost
☮It is not my wish to debate in this forum,
when *Life* begins.
when *Life* begins.
It is my intention to
celebrate *Life* in all stages and all forms,
here in this place among
friends, and with a healthy dose of humility.
~ Thank you!
Love!
So true! We're on a journey and the best thing we can do is drink it all in!
ReplyDeleteSo glad to see you here, Johanna! Thank you for stopping in for a visit! *Smile*
ReplyDeleteI'm really hoping to make something of this new series *Life is in the journey!* Felt the need for some sort of an introduction to *my* journey. Though, it really only scraped the surface of my enlightenment.
Enjoying your blog, Losing Sanity! I like your spirit!
Life is hard. And the joy we get has to be cherishes, as cheesy as it sounds.
ReplyDeleteWonderful post!
Hi, Lydia! Thanks! Maintaining some perspective is key, I've found. Even through trauma and tragedy, there's always someone whose pain is greater. A little empathy heals us all.
ReplyDeleteMy mom said to me years ago, "Most everyone walks around with a rock in their shoe. No matter how big or how small your rock is, it still hurts."
Her advice allowed me to see that we all need to give ourselves a little room to feel the rock in *our own shoe*. But, that it is just as important to let it go eventually. Wise, wise woman.
Oh my girl, you have a way with words! I think I keep saying that, but it bares repeating because I mean it. I come here to let my heart drink.
ReplyDeleteCatherine Denton
Dear Catherine, I love that! ~I come here to let my heart drink.~
ReplyDeleteLove! Love!
Stunning. Beautiful. Life is the journey. I have lost my sanity more times than I can remember. I have found ways to dig deeper and keep going in moments of pain. I have built walls around my heart and taken them down. I have sometimes shared openly and other times kept my thoughts and emotions to myself. Such is the life of a woman, a mother, a poet.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lindsey! I am so psyched to hear your voice!
ReplyDeleteWalls are certainly a construct of our own fears. Breaking them down, clawing at them when we must, reminds me of the baby chick.
Not the ~soft, fuzzy yellow ones~, but the ~wet, weak, desperate for air ones~. In order to survive, body and soul intact, we must work hard for what we want. For that elusive, Peace, we must break out of the shell that's grown up around us. There comes a time when fresh air trumps quiet isolation.
Wow! That either sounds profound or just silly. *wink*